Going through a break up is never a pleasant experience.
Both sides, stubborn to the core, lashing out with words they rarely mean to say.
After it is over, every emotion in the book runs through you r system, and it is hard to make heads or tails of anything.
Before you go running to get your ex back, there are certain actions you need to avoid.
As I just stated, number one is to avoid running back right away.
Both of you are hurting after the break up, and taking some time apart will have a lasting positive effect.
A week or two will allow you time to think through things, allow you to trust you can do it on your own, and come to terms with the break up and where it leaves you two.
Avoid the "oh, poor me" pity party.
Nothing will push your ex away more quickly than a needy, low esteem, blubbering partner.
Yes you are hurting and feel you have a right to feel that way.
However, be showing you are in control, and strong will speak volumes to your partner.
It says you are serious about the relationship and have the will to make it through this rough time.
Avoid pointing fingers, or placing blame.
You have had some time to think about your break up, and during that time, understand you part in the break up.
With a level head you will realize that both parties have some amount of blame for what has happened.
Accept your responsibility for your part, allow them to accept theirs.
Conversations you have should avoid blame.
Both of you need to accept what has happened, and move forward.
After a break up, you really are starting over in many ways.
How you once thought you knew your partner now needs to be looked at again.
You have learned something more about them and can use that to your advantage.
Build on the positives, and find alternatives (mutually agreeable) for the negatives.