When your girlfriend dumped you the pain was staggering. Everyone told you that it would fade over time. You kept waiting. You're still waiting. You want the pain to end but right now you'd be happy to settle for less. You're beginning to wonder if there's something wrong with you and that's why the pain isn't fading as promised. You really just want to know when it's going to start hurting less.

The Painful Truth about Breakups

Sadly, there is no timeline that works for everyone when it comes to breaking up and the pain it causes. It can be a real shock to the system when you're dumped – especially when you didn't see it coming. In these cases it will take a little longer than normal to get over the entire thing. But that doesn't mean it can't be done. You're just going to have to put a little effort into it in order to make it happen.

Decide You're Ready to Move On

Sometimes it takes a conscious decision on your part to sort of give yourself permission to move on. You have to be the one to decide it's time and make the necessary changes. Only YOU can decide that it's time to start dating someone new or simply to give up on getting your girlfriend back. No one else can make that decision for you. But, until you decide that it's time, your heart is going to remain in a state of limbo.

Build a Few Walls of Your Own

It's painfully obvious that your girlfriend, ex girlfriend, has done a little bit of mason work in the area around her heart. She's built some pretty high walls to guard against her feelings for you. It's time for you to start building a few walls of your own.

Some things you can do, in the meantime, to protect your heart include the following:

• Stop going to the places that hold strong memories for the two of you.

• Don't drive by her house.

• Remove her from your Facebook and Twitter feeds.

• Take her name off the contact list on your mobile phone and email.

• Avoid situations, at least until you have your emotions under control, where the two of you are likely to be together in the same room.

These are small steps you can take but it will help you avoid that "sucker punched" feelings whenever you cross paths with your ex.

Get YOUR Girlfriend Back

This is the option that's probably weighing most heavily on your mind. You believe that the pain will stop altogether if you can make this one simple thing happen. The problem is you don't know where to begin.