It usually sounds like a good thing when you first think about it.
You want to get back with your ex girlfriend, so you decide that the right thing to do is to try and be friends with her.
You figure that if you just hang out with her as friends, you will have ample opportunities to turn things in another direction and pretty soon, you'd be more than friends again, she would become your girlfriend and you wouldn't have to worry about a thing.
Yeah, when you first think about it, it probably does seem like a good idea.
However, as most guys who try this out quickly realize, it's not all it's cracked up to be.
There is a price that you pay when you become her friend.
Think about it like this - most guys try really hard not to get dropped into the friend zone with a woman they like and they usually end up there anyway.
When they do, they find that this is pretty much where they are going to stay.
Now, if you intentionally put yourself there with your ex girlfriend, do you really think it is somehow going to work out differently than it does for most guys? It's not, trust me.
When you try to be her chum, her buddy, her pal - you are disqualifying yourself as being someone she would date.
You become that guy who will take her out to lunch just to talk, while they guy who gets to take her out to dinner gets to do a lot more than just talk to her.
You can't try to be her pal because deep down, that is not what you want to be.
Most guys choose this route because they are afraid to be vulnerable, to put themselves out there and potentially face rejection.
Where is that really going to get you? Not where you want to get, that's for sure.
What you are going to have to do if you want to win back your ex girlfriend is realize that being her friend is a sure shot way to end up becoming someone she would not date again.
Once you realize that, then you will see that the only choices that you have are to try and win her back as your girlfriend, or move on and forget about the hopes of anything happening between you and her again.
I've known plenty of guys who have been able to win back their ex girlfriend and they all have one thing in common.
They were not trying to be friends with their ex girlfriend, they were trying to be her boyfriend again.
You may feel a bit insecure and think that it would be "safe" to be just her buddy, but that is not going to satisfy you if what you really want is a relationship.
You really do have to admit to yourself that you want her to be your girlfriend again and take a chance on making that happen.
Sure, you might lose out.
You might also win.