Many people have the desire to find that special someone - a person who loves, respects, and supports them in their growth as individuals, and accepts this support in return.
When both parties are emotionally balanced and the relationship dynamic is a healthy one, this outcome can be had with effort, good communication, commitment, and love.
However, sometimes one or both individuals come into the relationship with personal issues that are very destructive to the other person and the relationship in general.
Often, people who are abusive, addicted to substances, or don't maintain fidelity pair up with partners who are very nurturing, non-judgmental, and kind.
These are wonderful qualities, but if not paired with strong boundaries, they can be exploited and do harm to the traumatized partner.
Here are 4 signals you might tolerate too much in your relationships: 1.
You minimize and/or rationalize your partner's behavior to yourself.
You might compare your partner's destructive behavior with others, determining that it isn't as bad.
While this may be true, it doesn't mean that what your partner is doing is acceptable.
2.
You deny or make excuses for the damaging behavior to others.
You might feel compelled to defend or hide the destructive activity to preserve his or her reputation, but also to minimize the shame you feel over what you are tolerating.
3.
You feel as if you can't survive without the relationship.
Arguments may be dropped, and ultimatums may be left to slide.
When it comes right down to it, you are afraid you can't go on without this person, and compromise your boundaries to keep him or her from leaving.
4.
You worry about what your partner will do if you leave him or her.
You might feel as if he or she couldn't possibly manage without you, or feel guilt over what he or she might do if you leave.
In this way you are taking responsibility for your partner's well being, however you are not responsible for "saving" your partner at your own expense.
When both parties are emotionally balanced and the relationship dynamic is a healthy one, this outcome can be had with effort, good communication, commitment, and love.
However, sometimes one or both individuals come into the relationship with personal issues that are very destructive to the other person and the relationship in general.
Often, people who are abusive, addicted to substances, or don't maintain fidelity pair up with partners who are very nurturing, non-judgmental, and kind.
These are wonderful qualities, but if not paired with strong boundaries, they can be exploited and do harm to the traumatized partner.
Here are 4 signals you might tolerate too much in your relationships: 1.
You minimize and/or rationalize your partner's behavior to yourself.
You might compare your partner's destructive behavior with others, determining that it isn't as bad.
While this may be true, it doesn't mean that what your partner is doing is acceptable.
2.
You deny or make excuses for the damaging behavior to others.
You might feel compelled to defend or hide the destructive activity to preserve his or her reputation, but also to minimize the shame you feel over what you are tolerating.
3.
You feel as if you can't survive without the relationship.
Arguments may be dropped, and ultimatums may be left to slide.
When it comes right down to it, you are afraid you can't go on without this person, and compromise your boundaries to keep him or her from leaving.
4.
You worry about what your partner will do if you leave him or her.
You might feel as if he or she couldn't possibly manage without you, or feel guilt over what he or she might do if you leave.
In this way you are taking responsibility for your partner's well being, however you are not responsible for "saving" your partner at your own expense.
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