Most people are terrible when it comes to explaining or articulating their feelings.
It is a proven fact that people cannot quantify what they want in a partner so they often rely on generic positive qualities.
Women are especially guilty of this.
There is a reason most women can't easily pick a wedding dress: psychologically they can't articulate what they want.
Here are a few tips for solving this problem when it comes to men.
1.
The Devil is in the details.
Identify the little things about past relationships that annoyed or bothered you and expand from there.
Something like if your old boyfriend was always late annoying you might actually indicate that you are looking for someone who is dependable, and not someone who is spontaneous or spur of the moment.
This is like reverse engineering for your relationship.
2.
It is OK to be Shallow.
Physical appearance does matter.
Be honest about the physical qualities you are looking for in a man.
If you are constantly dating guys with "great personalities" you are not really doing them any favors in the long run.
Stop being charitable with your relationship time because you don't want to look like a shallow b-word.
It is OK to demand what you want for from life.
2.
b Is about money.
You don't have to be a gold-digger to be concerned about long-term financial stability.
3.
Stop Setting Yourself up for Failure.
In academics if someone does not want to accept that they may not be adequate for a specific task, they subconsciously do things to make themselves fail.
This is why some people drink all night before a test, or refuse to study.
This pre-generated excuse protects their ego from the truth of their own limitations.
In relationships this is why women sometimes pick "projects" for relationships.
Stop dating guys that have no jobs, or drink to much, or gamble to much etc.
These guys may have built in excuses for you when the relationships fails, but they are not helping you in the long run.