Significance

• An important part of becoming a mature human being is learning to talk to girls...to boys...to adults...to everybody. Many adults have problems talking to each other and must continue improving their communication skills throughout their lives. Communication is basic to being human, yet communication is a learned skill that takes time and effort.
  
  

Function

• Although you can get away with not saying much most of the time, at some point you'll find yourself in a situation where you'll have to talk to girls. You may want to ask a girl out on a date or for help with a homework assignment. You may find yourself at a party talking to girls you've never met. Your sister may host a pajama party and expect you to be friendly to her girlfriends. Knowing how to talk to girls easily, without feeling uncomfortable, is important in these situations. Later on, you'll work with, go to college with, and/or socialize with women. You'll have female doctors and form professional relationships with women. So no matter whether you want to be romantic or to hire her as a mechanic, you'll find it advisable to learn to communicate with girls, young ladies and women.
  
  

Benefits

• When you learn how to comfortably talk to girls, you'll notice many rewards. Girls respond to boys who seem comfortable and confident. They'll like talking to you and will want to repeat the experience. And when you learn to talk to girls naturally and confidently, you can then apply your new social skills in other situations besides talking to girls. You'll learn how to easily talk to teachers, doctors and new kids at school. Plus, you'll gain confidence in yourself, confidence you can apply to everything you do throughout your life. Talking to girls is just the beginning.
  
  

Misconceptions

• The biggest misconception about talking to girls is that all girls are judging you and eager to criticize you, laugh at you or otherwise embarrass you. Although some might do this, many girls have a lot of tolerance for somebody who's nervous or shy and will encourage you to talk. Most people, in fact, like talking to each other. We're social beings and that's what we do. Another misconception is that girls don't have problems talking to boys or to each other. In fact, girls often have just as many problems as you do.
  
  

Prevention/Solution

• How do you get used to talking to girls? By practicing. Practice first with your sister, your mother, your cousin, your friend or any other female you're comfortable with. If you tell your female relatives you're trying to get over your shyness or discomfort, they'll understand and might not even tease you too much. With your "fake girl," play a role-playing game where you pretend you're asking a girl out or starting up a conversation with a girl. Then switch roles---you be the girl and let the other person be the boy. You'll be surprised to see how nervous you are on both sides of the fence. Then go out and try it on real girls.
  
  

Considerations

• To prevent yourself getting nervous when it's time to really talk to a girl you don't know very well, keep the following things in mind.
  1) Girls get nervous, too. Sometimes they hide it well with chatter or by being "quiet and mysterious," but most girls are just as nervous as boys. So instead of thinking how nervous you are, think what you can do to make the girl feel less nervous. Smile at her, praise her, make her feel good about herself.
  2) Girls want friends as much as you do. Although it might be awkward at first to talk to them, you'll soon see that they don't see you as an actor who's performing---even though you might feel like that---but as a potential friend. So if you can, try to treat her as "one of the guys." She'll appreciate being spoken to as a person rather than a pretty object on a shelf.
  3) Every girl is different. One girl might embarrass you on purpose if you look at her wrong. Such a girl probably does the same thing to many others, girls and boys alike. Another girl might try to catch your eye and be frustrated that you don't seem to notice. Another girl might have never noticed you, but when you venture to talk to her, will be warmly welcoming.
  Take into account that girls are as different and varied as boys and you will feel more comfortable talking to girls.
  
  

Warning

• If you embarrass yourself when talking to girls, it's tempting to give up. But everybody has bad experiences; learn from them. Maybe your timing was wrong. Maybe you should have taken 10 deep breaths before approaching her. Maybe she's not as nice as you thought she was. Keep trying. You'll get more comfortable and soon you'll forget you ever had any problems talking to girls.