I was twenty one years old, and pregnant for the first time.
I soon realized that to women share their opinions about birth and babies more frequently than their favorite book and with the same reverence as offering your their secret family recipes.
I couldn't step foot into a room without someone asking me about baby names, cribs, room decorations, babysitting, nursing vs.
formula feeding, or whether or not to use a binky and when it is time to take it away.
The list goes on and on.
Every mother I knew had answers for my questions, many of which I never even got a chance to ask.
No matter what, the conversation always headed towards the birth story.
I am sure you have heard many.
They are battle stories for females.
It seemed that the longer the labor and the more intense the pain--the better.
It was almost as if they were trying to scare me with their foreign labor terms like, "contractions," "placenta," "transition," and "emergency c-section!" Women cherish their birth stories.
They are prizes won after walking through the shadow of death.
So, you can imagine the remarks I received when I mentioned I was planning on having a natural childbirth.
The room would suddenly go quiet and ghosts of a smile would creep onto their faces.
I like to call them "smirks.
" The expression that comes when a person can't wait to prove you wrong.
It was inevitable.
How could such a "young girl" conquer labor and delivery on her own without an epidural? Impossible.
Luckily, I was terrified of needles.
That helped me stay strong to my commitment to have my baby without pain medication.
I had done plenty of research on which to base my decision.
I believed it was better for me and the baby to avoid putting something foreign, like the medicine from an epidural, into such a natural process.
Recovery times appear to be faster and labor seems to proceed more quickly with a natural birth.
I had also read testimonials from other women who had experienced natural child birth and they shared the absolute empowerment that they felt after accomplishing their goal.
Mothers described their labor as, "liberating," "thrilling," "exiting," "empowering," and "spiritual.
" All the things I wanted my labor to be.
So, I stuck to my goal.
I prepared my mind and body using, meditation, positive affirmation phrases about birth and motherhood, and relaxation exercises.
I knew I could do it, and I did.
And it was incredible.
If you are considering a natural childbirth, know that you are going to be laughed at, poked, prodded, questioned and envied for your decision.
How do you overcome the negativity to reach your goal? Here are a few tips: 1.
Love yourself.
This is the first and most important part of the process.
The popular public speaker and author Mike Robbins said, "When we truly love ourselves, most of what we worry about and even much of what we strive for in life becomes meaningless.
We may still have some worries, and we'll definitely continue to have goals, dreams and desires.
However, from a place of true self appreciation and self love, the fear behind our worries and the motivation for our goals dramatically changes from something we have to avoid or produce in order to be accepted and valued to something we're genuinely concerned about or really want to accomplish.
" When we love ourselves, our goals become part of who we are and we are not effected by the thoughts and actions of others around us.
We know of our true power and are able to believe in our ability to accomplish the tasks we set out to do.
2.
Learn to laugh.
Being pregnant is a lot of work.
Our bodies are in a constant state of change.
Hormone levels fluctuate and cause emotions to seem out of control.
If you can learn to take a step back and laugh at yourself, it really does relieve stress.
Being happy allows you to avoid taking other people's comments too seriously.
If you can keep a real smile on your face, you aren't likely to be offended.
3.
Speak about yourself positively.
Women are amazing.
Birth is such an empowering experience.
As a pregnant women you are actually creating life.
What could be more important that that? If you are to have the confidence necessary to have a natural childbirth, when it seems no one else believes you can do it, you need to talk about yourself as you truly are.
Recognize your true divine nature.
Speak about your abilities in a positive way.
If you believe in yourself, others will also.
4.
Surround yourself with cheerleaders.
You might not be able to control what people think, but you can control who you spend time with.
Pick people who have the same beliefs as you do.
Find the friends that will boost you up and cheer you on towards your goals.
Take some time away from those who doubt you or put you down.
You don't have time for negativity! If you tell your friends and family how you feel about having a natural childbirth, and ask for their support, there will be plenty of them that will surround your with their love and support.
Spend your time with them.
5.
Prepare your mind and body.
Birth is natural.
Women were born to have babies.
It is innate.
But, things do go more smoothly when you have prepared your mind and body to deal with it.
Learn how to relax.
Spend time each day meditating.
Focus on your breathing and how you can control your emotions with your breath.
Memorize positive affirmation statements about womanhood and birth to give you confidence.
There are many free programs available to women at local hospitals and women's centers.
Attend some.
Knowledge is power.
The more you understand about the birth process the better.
Fear is replaced with confidence.
You have the right to create the birth you desire.
Don't let other people influence your decision to have a natural childbirth.
It is an amazing experience.
You can do it!