Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

4 Things to Do Before You See a Marriage Counsellor

It's sometimes terrifying to harbor the thought of going to a marriage counselor to see if they can render help save your marriage.
If he fails to save your marriage, you might be on your own again when you have been in a marriage for some time.
With all the anger and despair you may be feeling, it is alright to be in a panic mode before you see a marriage counselor.
All you want to do is to change things.
However, when you want to make things right, sometimes the things you do can make things even worse.
All you want to do is 'save your marriage', If this is what you want, then there are 4 things you should do.
However, avoid making any irritating mistake that will turn your spouse off.
(1) Show your spouse that you are not afraid even if the marriage ends in a divorce: If you should find out your ex is frightening you with the issue of divorce, this could actually work in your favor.
You should never worry about the threats.
This is because nearly all relationships started on a fear of break-up emotional felling.
It may be wise for you to start going out with some friends again.
What ends up happening is that he/she will think about those good times you shared together, and chances are they will start missing you again, and all their wrong feelings tend to fade away.
(2) Prove to your spouse that there's more in your life, that they haven't seen everything yet: One of the best ways to keep your marriage safe is to prove to your spouse that are going on very well with your life: Most people want to sit back, listen to sappy songs and cry when they see that the roof of their once happy marriage is on fire.
However, you should keep active and stay communal.
The sooner you do this, the better.
As long as your spouse sees that you are carrying on with your life, he/she may seek out the reason for your happiness.
And this curiosity, tends to make him/her also to act like life is treating them well too.
At first, it may be a false impression, but when you look happy and your spouse looks happy, it makes the marriage counselor's task even easier, and eventually both of you will embed true happiness in your home again.
(3) No deceit: Do not believe that you can live a normal life outside your spouse.
Divorce is a deep pit, and if you fall into one, you are likely to enter another.
There are few chances that you might meet someone better, but chances of a divorcee marrying someone who is not a divorcee are very few and far apart.
If it is unlikely that your spouse will get stay with you, my advice is that you work towards that direction.
you can take what you learned in this article and put it to work.
That doesn't mean you shouldn't see a marriage counselor anymore.
NO! Try everything possible to save your marriage, even if it means getting his/her friends to solicit for you.
Just know that if it doesn't work out, you weren't lonely doing nothing.
(4) Express love and tenderness to your spouse: Did you know that expressing a little tenderness now may be the best thing you can do especially before you see a marriage counselor? Why is this so? Now is the time to come up with some kind of idea that can help you save your marriage.
If you show your spouse some tenderness by speaking lovely things to them (should it be rude not to speak to them, then talk to them), then chances are it is likely succeed in applying the techniques that will be recommended by the counselor and save your marriage.
These ideas are only few ways to save your marriage, and avoid divorce.
I learnt them from various books marriage.
But it is not all, be open to other opinions.
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