Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

Marriage Help For Christians - How Does a Woman Respect a Man Who Does Not Love?

This marriage help for Christians answers the question: How does a woman respect a man who does not love her? Ephesians 5:33 says, "However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband" (NIV). This isn't a problem in a healthy marriage, but it is tricky in a difficult marriage.

Respect means to honor or value. It is incredibly difficult to respect a man who is acting in a way that leads a wife to disrespect him. Love means to care for someone in a way that takes their needs into consideration and cherishes and values. When a man doesn't love himself enough to care for his own body and life by making wise choices, he can't love his wife.

Love and respect are reciprocal. It is difficult to love someone who doesn't respect you; conversely, it is difficult to respect someone who doesn't love you. However, there are six things you can do to show respect to a man that doesn't act in ways that you respect and who doesn't love you as he should:

1. You can respect the position and treat him in a way that acknowledges he is your husband, however, it does not mean you cannot say no, set boundaries, or speak the truth-even if those things feel disrespectful to him.

2. A man feels respected when he is appreciated and acknowledged. Appreciate and acknowledge him for the things he is doing right. You do not have to pretend you respect his choices in other areas.

3. When needing to confront your husband, do it in the things that really matter and in a way that is as respectful as possible (i.e. not nagging, putting him down, yelling, or undermining him in front of others). Just state your own truth clearly and simply.

4. Men feel respected when they lead their families. If you can safely allow your husband to make decisions, let him lead and experience the natural consequences of his leadership. Evaluate the things you have taken over and see if each is really necessary, but use wisdom and be willing to protect your family if needed.

5. Do your part in the marriage. Continue to be his wife and take care of your responsibilities in a way that is not demeaning to you.

6. Do not treat him with disdain or contempt. No matter what he has or hasn't done, he is still a human being loved by God.

This marriage help for Christians gives you six things you can do to respect a man who does not love you as he should.

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