"Forgiveness is a decision, not a feeling, because when we forgive we no longer feel the offense, we no longer feel resentment.
Forgive, when forgiving your soul will find peace and you will give peace to your offended.
"Mother Teresa of Calcutta Dragging the past into our present-day lives is meaningless when it becomes an obstacle to enjoying the present.
Sometimes we "charge" memories that often trap us and make us "re-live" over and over what has already happened.
When we are traumatized our brain uses forgetfulness as a control mechanism to cope with the pain.
We do remember beautiful things but it is more common to have the traumatic recall, which makes sense because as humans we flee from pain naturally.
Similarly, memories can prevent us from getting the same problem back.
Memories are stored in all our senses, especially when things happen in a way we never expected.
Anything that triggers from that event, such as a sound, a touch or a hit, a color, a voice, a song or a movie, is enough reason to open our mental files.
In some cases they are totally open and disorganized keeping us in a constant turmoil.
We transform our pain into suffering by paying too much attention to those memories.
Our emotional brain is a "very primitive" system, when overactive; it causes us to lose rationality, tends to generalize, increases our negative thinking, perceives events in a negative way and keeps us as either/both the victim or the aggressor.
When is overactive, this limbic system loses connection with the prefrontal cortex which is in charge of judgment, problem solving and critical thinking, furthermore, the ability to feel and express emotions is lost.
When unhealthy, a physical wound becomes infected.
An emotional wound also becomes a chronic problem.
Resentment can create multiple layers of negative emotions affecting both physical and mental wellbeing thereby impacting our quality of life.
Ruminating obsessively is negative and becomes a bad habit that can lead into pain addiction because our brain reacts by secreting dopamine to balance the chemical imbalance generated by our negative thinking.
Healing the past is simple but is not easy; this healing process is very different for each person and each situation is different as well.
Some of the important features we may observe when seeking for help are: RUMINATING, or thinking the same thoughts over and over, can make us slaves to our negative memories and stop us from living here and now.
We remain "trapped" in such events; because emotionally we re-experience the situation every time we attend to them.
In therapy, we learn to be just spectators of painful, past situations, to have a different view of what has already happened.
Every counselling session could open the range of possibilities for a different perception.
We can not change what is done, during the therapeutic process my clients move from denial to acceptance.
It is very important to observe the following normal responses: UNRESOLVEDRESENTMENT CAN DAMAGE NEW RELATIONSHIPS: Every time we re-live a difficult situation that happened in the past painful memories can keep hurting us over and over.
Painful memories lead to resentment because we attempt to imagine justice when it is far too late.
If we believe that someone from our past did not defend us or abandoned us when we needed them, we can re-live feelings of tremendous anger.
Such resentment affects our inner self and our present relationship with others, even though they have nothing to do with our unfinished business.
TURNING ANGER INWARDS: We tend to punish ourselves for making mistakes or being the 'victim'.
We may blame ourselves for not reacting "properly", which is quite normal.
We would like to move on but we are afraid to 'get over it' because that would mean we let ourselves off the hook.
That is why forgiveness is such a precious gift for us.
Why are some people able to forgive but others can't? Forgiveness is a rational decision, an important question to address during this process is...
Are you feeling pain or suffering from the past that is affecting your life and relationships now? Because, when we cannot forgive the pain continues and we are responsible for creating the suffering in our present.
By forgiving, our inner world gains peace.
We begin to live in the present moment.
Painful memories from the past no longer have the power to hurt us because there is no longer any attachment to them.
The internal storm becomes a peaceful, flowing river.
There is nothing more precious than the power to release or forgive because we gain the gift of the present.
Letting go of the past If you have recognized that your past is limiting your present life, I would like to help you finally put the past to rest.
First of all, you will need to CHOOSE to let it go.
Are you ready to do this? If so, when will you begin? During the process, it will be important to accept the desire to change and also the lack of control over your recurring thoughts during your counselling.
Furthermore, you have to recognize that pain from your past is not who you are.
You will finally discover that beyond your beliefs, skills, experiences, emotions, thoughts or behaviour there is an internal and impartial observer, the real SELF.
To begin to forgive you have to necessarily accept all the emotions and thoughts that come with it.
During our counselling sessions, I can provide you with the professional support that facilitates this process.
Forgive, when forgiving your soul will find peace and you will give peace to your offended.
"Mother Teresa of Calcutta Dragging the past into our present-day lives is meaningless when it becomes an obstacle to enjoying the present.
Sometimes we "charge" memories that often trap us and make us "re-live" over and over what has already happened.
When we are traumatized our brain uses forgetfulness as a control mechanism to cope with the pain.
We do remember beautiful things but it is more common to have the traumatic recall, which makes sense because as humans we flee from pain naturally.
Similarly, memories can prevent us from getting the same problem back.
Memories are stored in all our senses, especially when things happen in a way we never expected.
Anything that triggers from that event, such as a sound, a touch or a hit, a color, a voice, a song or a movie, is enough reason to open our mental files.
In some cases they are totally open and disorganized keeping us in a constant turmoil.
We transform our pain into suffering by paying too much attention to those memories.
Our emotional brain is a "very primitive" system, when overactive; it causes us to lose rationality, tends to generalize, increases our negative thinking, perceives events in a negative way and keeps us as either/both the victim or the aggressor.
When is overactive, this limbic system loses connection with the prefrontal cortex which is in charge of judgment, problem solving and critical thinking, furthermore, the ability to feel and express emotions is lost.
When unhealthy, a physical wound becomes infected.
An emotional wound also becomes a chronic problem.
Resentment can create multiple layers of negative emotions affecting both physical and mental wellbeing thereby impacting our quality of life.
Ruminating obsessively is negative and becomes a bad habit that can lead into pain addiction because our brain reacts by secreting dopamine to balance the chemical imbalance generated by our negative thinking.
Healing the past is simple but is not easy; this healing process is very different for each person and each situation is different as well.
Some of the important features we may observe when seeking for help are: RUMINATING, or thinking the same thoughts over and over, can make us slaves to our negative memories and stop us from living here and now.
We remain "trapped" in such events; because emotionally we re-experience the situation every time we attend to them.
In therapy, we learn to be just spectators of painful, past situations, to have a different view of what has already happened.
Every counselling session could open the range of possibilities for a different perception.
We can not change what is done, during the therapeutic process my clients move from denial to acceptance.
It is very important to observe the following normal responses: UNRESOLVEDRESENTMENT CAN DAMAGE NEW RELATIONSHIPS: Every time we re-live a difficult situation that happened in the past painful memories can keep hurting us over and over.
Painful memories lead to resentment because we attempt to imagine justice when it is far too late.
If we believe that someone from our past did not defend us or abandoned us when we needed them, we can re-live feelings of tremendous anger.
Such resentment affects our inner self and our present relationship with others, even though they have nothing to do with our unfinished business.
TURNING ANGER INWARDS: We tend to punish ourselves for making mistakes or being the 'victim'.
We may blame ourselves for not reacting "properly", which is quite normal.
We would like to move on but we are afraid to 'get over it' because that would mean we let ourselves off the hook.
That is why forgiveness is such a precious gift for us.
Why are some people able to forgive but others can't? Forgiveness is a rational decision, an important question to address during this process is...
Are you feeling pain or suffering from the past that is affecting your life and relationships now? Because, when we cannot forgive the pain continues and we are responsible for creating the suffering in our present.
By forgiving, our inner world gains peace.
We begin to live in the present moment.
Painful memories from the past no longer have the power to hurt us because there is no longer any attachment to them.
The internal storm becomes a peaceful, flowing river.
There is nothing more precious than the power to release or forgive because we gain the gift of the present.
Letting go of the past If you have recognized that your past is limiting your present life, I would like to help you finally put the past to rest.
First of all, you will need to CHOOSE to let it go.
Are you ready to do this? If so, when will you begin? During the process, it will be important to accept the desire to change and also the lack of control over your recurring thoughts during your counselling.
Furthermore, you have to recognize that pain from your past is not who you are.
You will finally discover that beyond your beliefs, skills, experiences, emotions, thoughts or behaviour there is an internal and impartial observer, the real SELF.
To begin to forgive you have to necessarily accept all the emotions and thoughts that come with it.
During our counselling sessions, I can provide you with the professional support that facilitates this process.
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