About.com Rating

The Bottom Line

Even though this book is aimed at men, I'm sure that women will find it informative too. I think this would be great reading for women who have a lack of interest in sex, find sex to not be pleasurable, or who have not experienced orgasm.

For someone who wants to be a better lover, here are some sexual techniques presented in an honest way to help achieve that goal. Lou Paget explains why communication is so necessary if a couple wants to have great sex.

Paget outlines the importance of intimacy beyond the bedroom.

Pros

• Great bibliography!
• Looks at the importance of intimacy beyond the bedroom.
• Includes charts that rate lubricants, condoms and sex toys.

Cons

• People could get hung up on performance as a goal.
• Needs to emphasize more that technique is not as important as attitude.

Some of Paget's Thoughts:

• Foreplay is key to a woman's sexuality.
• Foreplay does not have to be sexual.
• Women care about variety, not performance.
• Safe sex is critical even in long term marriages. Her chapter on it is sobering. The statistics she presents are eye openers.
• Morning sex may be the best. Women's hormones peak between 7 a.m. and 10 a.m. Men's peak at around 10 a.m.
• Good old-fashioned courting, treating a woman like a lady, and making her feel special can make a woman desire a man.
• Being tired and having no time are the biggest blocks to intimacy.
• Women prefer a slow buildup. Don't rush things.
• Sex should be about pleasure not achieving a goal of orgasm.
• It is important that a man communicates with his wife why he masturbates so she doesn't think something is wrong with their sexual relationship.

 

Chapter Content

Several chapters in the book are about manual stimulation, oral sex, and sexual intercourse positions. Paget also includes charts that rate lubricants, condoms and sex toys. An extensive bibliography is also provided.

The illustrations in the book are graphic but not offensive. Actually, some of the drawings of the sex toys made me laugh. Different strokes for different folks ...

Lou's final note mentions that just being a technically proficient lover isn't enough. A truly expert lover has a confident and caring attitude. "The deepest and most satisfying sex usually comes when two people are open, honest, and respectful in their communication."

Even though this book is aimed at men, I'm sure that women will find it informative too. I think this would be great reading for women who have a lack of interest in sex, find sex to not be pleasurable, or who have not experienced orgasm.

This book has the answers to many questions couples may have regarding their sexual intimacy.