Many early childhood gurus suggest that authoritative parenting is the most democratic style of creating a fair, and balanced adult child.
Authoritative parents typically instill confidence, security and empathy in their children.
It is likely that these parents also grew up in homes where their parents were secure in themselves and created a loving atmosphere of trust, emotional stability and balance.
Authoritative parents tend to raise children who are well-adjusted and have a healthy sense of self-worth.
These parents raised their children in an environment that emphasized mutual respect, healthy boundaries, kindness, compassion and empathy.
Expectations and goals are age appropriate.
The importance of helping and giving is taught from an early age.
Authoritarian parenting can create a competitive atmosphere, speckled with anxiety, humiliation and embarrassment.
Raising children in this manner can result in adults who are angry, resentful and bitter towards the successes of others.
Authoritarian parents tend to be insecure, and can dominate through threats, neglectful, passive-aggressive discipline and behavior.
Blow-ups, silent treatment, insults and aggressiveness can title this style.
Authoritarian parenting can create adults with a rainbow of personalities ranging from passive to difficult.
Levels of insecurity in parents may lead to setting irrational, unrealistic, and unattainable goals for their children.
Here are two very different scenarios.
A child may have grown up in an authoritative home in which their mother either didn't go to or was able to afford a post high school education.
This mother's children may have post baccalaureate degrees.
Yet, this mother has the will and courage to move past the insecurities and family upbringing to become the mother she didn't have, by encouraging, motivating and inspiring each of her children.
This healthy mom would be on the frontlines of their successes, congratulating and showing their support, even during difficult times or at their first major success.
On the same token, the supportive mom may be too involved, and set unrealistic, unattainable goals (goals she would set for herself, if she were able to afford school).
Scenario two: Now, take this same mom with a completely different perspective, but of the authoritarian style, passive personality.
Visualize a mother who iswithdrawn, passive and resolute.
She discourages, minimizes and compares the success of her children to something unimportant and without value.
The resolute mother's adult children may then find themselves clamoring to please and gain her support, recognition and happiness.
When in reality, what may make this mother feel important, is to have a child who is beneath her, in intelligence, career and position.
Most families see your potential to succeed, but others see it as a means to tell you what you "should" be doing and thinking.
Families that see the potential in their siblings, want to help them be successful and do so by saying positive things, lifting them up and publicly encouraging and even bragging about their successes.
Seeing others as successes, in spite of their failures or disappointments, contributes to a healthy balance of emotional maturity.
Living in the past, doting on past failures, weaknesses and what "could" have done better, only promotes an atmosphere of sadness and disappointment.
Have you known some of the people in your family to sell you out to a relative or significant other? Who you are today, depends on what you want to be.
Are you willing to do the work to change what happened to you or who you became in the past? Or, are you content with yourself? Your past does not have to dictate your personality today, you do.
Authoritative parents typically instill confidence, security and empathy in their children.
It is likely that these parents also grew up in homes where their parents were secure in themselves and created a loving atmosphere of trust, emotional stability and balance.
Authoritative parents tend to raise children who are well-adjusted and have a healthy sense of self-worth.
These parents raised their children in an environment that emphasized mutual respect, healthy boundaries, kindness, compassion and empathy.
Expectations and goals are age appropriate.
The importance of helping and giving is taught from an early age.
Authoritarian parenting can create a competitive atmosphere, speckled with anxiety, humiliation and embarrassment.
Raising children in this manner can result in adults who are angry, resentful and bitter towards the successes of others.
Authoritarian parents tend to be insecure, and can dominate through threats, neglectful, passive-aggressive discipline and behavior.
Blow-ups, silent treatment, insults and aggressiveness can title this style.
Authoritarian parenting can create adults with a rainbow of personalities ranging from passive to difficult.
Levels of insecurity in parents may lead to setting irrational, unrealistic, and unattainable goals for their children.
Here are two very different scenarios.
A child may have grown up in an authoritative home in which their mother either didn't go to or was able to afford a post high school education.
This mother's children may have post baccalaureate degrees.
Yet, this mother has the will and courage to move past the insecurities and family upbringing to become the mother she didn't have, by encouraging, motivating and inspiring each of her children.
This healthy mom would be on the frontlines of their successes, congratulating and showing their support, even during difficult times or at their first major success.
On the same token, the supportive mom may be too involved, and set unrealistic, unattainable goals (goals she would set for herself, if she were able to afford school).
Scenario two: Now, take this same mom with a completely different perspective, but of the authoritarian style, passive personality.
Visualize a mother who iswithdrawn, passive and resolute.
She discourages, minimizes and compares the success of her children to something unimportant and without value.
The resolute mother's adult children may then find themselves clamoring to please and gain her support, recognition and happiness.
When in reality, what may make this mother feel important, is to have a child who is beneath her, in intelligence, career and position.
Most families see your potential to succeed, but others see it as a means to tell you what you "should" be doing and thinking.
Families that see the potential in their siblings, want to help them be successful and do so by saying positive things, lifting them up and publicly encouraging and even bragging about their successes.
Seeing others as successes, in spite of their failures or disappointments, contributes to a healthy balance of emotional maturity.
Living in the past, doting on past failures, weaknesses and what "could" have done better, only promotes an atmosphere of sadness and disappointment.
Have you known some of the people in your family to sell you out to a relative or significant other? Who you are today, depends on what you want to be.
Are you willing to do the work to change what happened to you or who you became in the past? Or, are you content with yourself? Your past does not have to dictate your personality today, you do.
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