Stress is a frequent issue in infertile couples but is it the cause of the infertility? So many couples conceive naturally once the stress is taken away that it is more likely than not that the stress was the cause of the problem. But what type of stress matters and what is too much stress?

Stress is very individual. One man's meat is another man's poison. This old saying gives a perfect explanation for the different responses we see with stress. Speaking in public has been nominated as the number one stress situation for most people - personally I love it. But some people enjoy jumping out of aeroplanes and that has no appeal to me at all.

When we are excited or fearful our bodies secrete stress hormones. We need these to survive. They are a normal part of life. But different people produce different amounts of stress hormones in response to the same levels of external stressors. This probably involves our genes but food also affect our moods and our stress responses. For example, there is clear experimental evidence that lecithin, a normal component of our diet, reduces the hormonal response to stress.

Our cells are not too keen on some of the hormones that are excreted under stress. I used to work in a laboratory where there was a doctor who was very keen to look at the chromosomes of some young criminal offenders, who he thought had sex chromosome abnormalities. These adolescents were often brought into the hospital kicking, swearing and biting. Our laboratory usually had no trouble growing cultures of blood cells for chromosome analysis but the cells of these stressed boys often did not grow. Since then, we have always found that if a person is very stressed by having his or her blood taken, the cells will not grow in culture. The cells in the body behave in the same way as they do in culture - that is they don't grow if stress hormone levels are too high. So in times of major stress, a fertilised egg will not implant and a slightly later pregnancy can miscarry. The cells just stop dividing.

Here are a couple of stories that describe the types of stress that cause fertility problems.

Maree and Alex were building their own home so they went to live with Alex's mother. Maree found the living arrangements very demanding. She felt she was treated somewhat like a servant and was continuously criticised. In the twelve months they lived there, Maree was unable to conceive. Shortly after they moved into their own home, she became pregnant.

Julie worked had a stressful job as a corporate lawyer. She had no trouble conceiving but she continually miscarried. Her diet and lifestyle were otherwise ideal. After five miscarriages she decided to work only two days per week with the intention of resigning once she was fourteen weeks pregnant. The reduction in hours achieved their goal. She is now the mother of four beautiful daughters. Julie is able to describe the huge change that occurred in her body once she reduced her exposure to the highly stressful situation.

There are many other stories of this type. Some might involve other additional factors. For example whilst going on a holiday might reduce stress, it might also remove the exposure to some toxic agent in the environment. Since being infertile or having miscarriages is itself extremely stressful, once a problem has been identified it is important to reduce all stressors. If you recognise that you are living in an environment that is causing you stress, try to postpone reproduction until you can leave that environment or can eliminate the stress.

The whole picture of lifestyle and its effects on fertility are described in my popular book It Takes Two , which is available as a hard copy or e-book through my websites.