Experts are no strangers to parental struggles amidst teenage angst.
These are a few tips for people striving to make it through this particular stage of parenthood unscathed: Don't establish rules for the sake of imposing them Sometimes parents worry that they are not "parenting" enough, and as such, they impose random rules on their teenagers in order to assert control.
According to counsellors, it's not a good idea to establish rules simply for the sake of it.
If a teenager is clearly an accomplished student but also watches a fair amount of television, then there's no reason for his parents to randomly declare something along the lines of, "That's it - you can only watch an hour of TV per night, and nothing more.
" In this situation, the imposition of such a rule is likely to rub the teenager the wrong way, and understandably so.
After all, if all of that television-watching doesn't seem to be negatively impacting the child's performance at school, then why punish him by withholding something that makes him happy? By declaring such a rule, a parent is merely sending a message that he is the boss, and that the child must abide by his rules whether or not they are fair.
It is therefore important that parents stay goal-oriented when establishing rules.
One of the worst debates that a parent can get into with his teenager is the "Why? Because I said so!" verbal tug of war.
If a teenage child asks a parent why a certain rule is being imposed, then the parent should be able to provide a valid answer.
Denying a teenager that answer insulting his intelligence and sending the message that despite the fact that he is getting older and wiser, he doesn't get any more of a say in his life.
This will only anger the teenager, causing him to become more rebellious.
Parents should remember that when something seems to be working well for a child, then it's best to either encourage such activity or, at the very least, leave the situation alone.
In the case of a teenager who watches a lot of TV but maintains a respectable grade point average, the parents shouldn't be expected to suggest new shows for the child to add to his weekly lineup.
At the same time, they should recognize their child's success at school in conjunction with his television habits and hold off on imposing restrictions until he gives them a reason to do so.
Give yourself credit as a parent Once you have a child, you're propelled into a constant state of parenting, whether you initially realize it or not.
As your child gets older, it's important to become aware of your parenting methods so that you can learn to focus on what you're doing right as a parent.
For most parents, the goal in raising children is to produce well-rounded, content, productive members of society.
As such, most parents take steps to instill proper values in their children starting at an early age.
However, once their children reach the teenage stage of life, many parents suddenly feel the need to reinvent the wheel by imposing new guidelines and implementing new parenting tactics with which their children might be wholly unfamiliar.
Not only is this unnecessary, it actually often serves to confuse and alienate the children involved.
When it comes to parenting, consistency is truly key.
Rather than devise creative new ways to teach your teenager what to do and how to act, keep doing the same things you've been doing all along, and give yourself credit for bringing your child up in a manner that serves him well.
Recognize that your child's achievements to date are not accidental.
Tthen figure out what you did to contribute to them and continue to parent in a similar fashion.
Instead of assuming that you'll have to come up with new ways to manage your child now that he's becoming a teenager, give yourself credit for the old parenting methods that have been working all along, and stick to them.
There's no doubt that raising a teenager is a daunting task.
However, as long as parents are armed with the proper knowledge, they can survive these years, and even have a touch of sanity left over.
These are a few tips for people striving to make it through this particular stage of parenthood unscathed: Don't establish rules for the sake of imposing them Sometimes parents worry that they are not "parenting" enough, and as such, they impose random rules on their teenagers in order to assert control.
According to counsellors, it's not a good idea to establish rules simply for the sake of it.
If a teenager is clearly an accomplished student but also watches a fair amount of television, then there's no reason for his parents to randomly declare something along the lines of, "That's it - you can only watch an hour of TV per night, and nothing more.
" In this situation, the imposition of such a rule is likely to rub the teenager the wrong way, and understandably so.
After all, if all of that television-watching doesn't seem to be negatively impacting the child's performance at school, then why punish him by withholding something that makes him happy? By declaring such a rule, a parent is merely sending a message that he is the boss, and that the child must abide by his rules whether or not they are fair.
It is therefore important that parents stay goal-oriented when establishing rules.
One of the worst debates that a parent can get into with his teenager is the "Why? Because I said so!" verbal tug of war.
If a teenage child asks a parent why a certain rule is being imposed, then the parent should be able to provide a valid answer.
Denying a teenager that answer insulting his intelligence and sending the message that despite the fact that he is getting older and wiser, he doesn't get any more of a say in his life.
This will only anger the teenager, causing him to become more rebellious.
Parents should remember that when something seems to be working well for a child, then it's best to either encourage such activity or, at the very least, leave the situation alone.
In the case of a teenager who watches a lot of TV but maintains a respectable grade point average, the parents shouldn't be expected to suggest new shows for the child to add to his weekly lineup.
At the same time, they should recognize their child's success at school in conjunction with his television habits and hold off on imposing restrictions until he gives them a reason to do so.
Give yourself credit as a parent Once you have a child, you're propelled into a constant state of parenting, whether you initially realize it or not.
As your child gets older, it's important to become aware of your parenting methods so that you can learn to focus on what you're doing right as a parent.
For most parents, the goal in raising children is to produce well-rounded, content, productive members of society.
As such, most parents take steps to instill proper values in their children starting at an early age.
However, once their children reach the teenage stage of life, many parents suddenly feel the need to reinvent the wheel by imposing new guidelines and implementing new parenting tactics with which their children might be wholly unfamiliar.
Not only is this unnecessary, it actually often serves to confuse and alienate the children involved.
When it comes to parenting, consistency is truly key.
Rather than devise creative new ways to teach your teenager what to do and how to act, keep doing the same things you've been doing all along, and give yourself credit for bringing your child up in a manner that serves him well.
Recognize that your child's achievements to date are not accidental.
Tthen figure out what you did to contribute to them and continue to parent in a similar fashion.
Instead of assuming that you'll have to come up with new ways to manage your child now that he's becoming a teenager, give yourself credit for the old parenting methods that have been working all along, and stick to them.
There's no doubt that raising a teenager is a daunting task.
However, as long as parents are armed with the proper knowledge, they can survive these years, and even have a touch of sanity left over.
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